The Power of Writing to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Awareness

When I first launched The Intuitive Writing Project in 2013, all I knew was how important writing had been for me. Today, after twelve years and over 3,500 hours of class-time, I can say with 100% certainty that writing is the most effective, the most cathartic, the most clarifying, and also the most joyful way to build self-confidence and self-awareness in teenage girls. 

Here are three reasons why I believe writing is the antidote to everything teenage girls are struggling with today:

1. Critical Thinking Skills When girls write reflectively about their lives, what they’re actually learning is how to think critically, how to clarify their own thoughts and values in order to think for themselves as the leaders of their own lives.

   The ability to write and think critically IS what will protect your daughter from the soul-crushing, mind-numbing effects of both social media and AI.
   

2. Mental Health Support Because language is stored in the rational part of the brain, writing about our feelings accesses the whole brain, reducing anxiety and stress to help build emotional resilience and mental health. Likewise, writing as part of a supportive community fosters a sense of connection which girls often describe to me as “the best support group ever.”
   

3. Self-Awareness & Self Confidence

   Academically, a weekly writing practice improves writing skills and fluency overall while priming your daughter to write exceptional college essays. Girls who write with me for several months learn not only who they are but how to tell their story in a powerful way.  

   Conversely, the kids who come to me during the fall of their senior year—having never written outside of school—struggle to write anything at all. What I know from ten years of college essay coaching is this: if girls aren’t supported in a weekly, self-reflective writing practice, if girls spend every minute of every day trying to absorb external knowledge, they will not have the time to develop the most important form of knowledge, which is self-knowledge—which just so happens to be one of the qualities colleges value most.

   The ancient Greeks were the ones who first said, “know thyself,” and that’s what college essay questions are trying to draw out. Colleges are looking for the young people who know who they are, know what matters to them, and know how they want to use their talents, strengths, and passions to contribute to the world in a meaningful way. On a personal note, it deeply pains me to see the kids who are not part of The Intuitive Writing Project struggle to understand themselves and write about themselves during the college essay process. The reason kids struggle is because we have denied them the time and space they need to discover who they really are. When kids have to spend every minute of their lives myopically focused on academic assignments, their mental health and self-esteem invariably suffers. Then, in a spectacularly-confusing bait-and-switch after junior year, we expect them to write exceptionally self-aware college essays, as if they were magicians suddenly tasked with pulling a hundred white bunnies from their hat.
   

In short, if you want your daughter to develop her own unique voice, to cultivate her confidence, and to believe in herself as the leader of her own life, consider signing her up for a free intro class—and then ask her how she feels afterwards. If you give her the time and space to write every week, she will get to experience the real magic that exists—not in top hats or magic wands—but inside of herself, in the powerful leader she has always been.